Friday, 25 December 2009

Christmas Day 2009 (Just)

Happy Christmas Everybody!

Hope you've had a great one?

We had a fantastic Crimbo Dinner thanks to Vanda. I contributed by carving the turkey breast, but that was the extent of my efforts and I'm very grateful to Van for producing such a nice spread.

I couldn't eat a whole lot, but I ate more than usual, and enough not to leave me feeling disappointed so that was great. I've also managed about two glasses of bubbles today, which is more alcohol than I've had for a long time - a special bottle of American Sonoma Valley Methode Champenoise from 1985 which I've been saving since about 1999, very tasty - some of the older Mercury folks might remember the trip up to the Sonoma Valley we took during a sales conference in San Francisco back in the days when we were given time off to take trips during the training schedule!

Anyway, thanks everybody for your Christmas wishes and calls, and I hope to see some of you soon!

Have a lovely relaxing Boxing Day, and I'll try to be in touch again soon!

Cheers

C x

Friday, 18 December 2009

Friday 18th December 2009

Wow, two posts in a week, it's almost like the old days! :)

I actually meant to post yesterday, but as usual got distracted and forgot!

A few bits of news from my various outings this week:

Tuesday - Oncologist

Dr Hofmann has been speaking to the main man in our region, and also with the UK expert in my type of cancer, based in London, and they jointly agree that more treatment would not be beneficial. They feel that the chances of any benefits are so slim, and the likelihood of side-effects so high that it is just not worth it. Even though I have suffered almost no side-effects from my previous treatments, they feel that I am a lot less strong than I was even when I had my last cycle that I would be less able to fight the effects and that might mean me ending up back in hospital. It's a blow, but I must say that I do agree with their way of thinking.

I am going to have one more scan, between Christmas and New Year which will show how and where things are developing, so at least I know which is going to be the troublesome area - liver, lungs etc. I'll get the results from that on the 5th Jan.

My oncologist also confirmed that a lot of my tiredness and loss of appetite will definitely be to do with the cancer and not just my inability to eat much. The tumour markers in my blood test show that the cancer is definitely active again, so this willl have a lot to do with the way I am feeling.

Wednesday - GP

Spent most of the appointment discussing the lack of effects of the Citalopram anti-depressants. I've been on them about 6 weeks now, and I can't tell any difference, so I'm swapping to a new one over the next week - Venlafaxine - we'll see if that makes any difference.

I've also been told that I can up the dose of the steroids I'm on over a short period to give me a boost of energy and appetite, so I will definitely do that over Christmas.

Thursday - Hospice

We had a tour around the hospice in-patients section, which looks very nice and is open to me at any time, but I don't want to think about that yet. I want to stay at home for as long as I'm able, preferrably until the end, as once you move to the hospice, you're never coming out again!

It seems they can do a lot for you to help you stay at home though, and the first step was for them to call in the District Nurse for an assessment regarding a hospital bed at home.

Friday - District Nurse

We've just had the nurse around and she has been explaining what is on offer. They can get me an electric adjustable bed with a pressure-relieving matress as soon as I want one. This will help me get in and out of bed and adjusts to a sitting position so that I can watch tv etc in comfort. I'm still ok with my bed at the moment, but I will go ahead and get this new bed in the new year.

Other things this week ...

Firstly, thanks for all the birthday cards, Facebook messages and texts etc - very kind of you!

Thanks also for all the Christmas cards so far. I have to say that we are doing our best, but we are unlikely to get all our cards done this year in time for the deadline on Monday, so please bear with me if you don't get a card this year. I do have the time, but it takes much more energy than you expect, so I hope you understand :(

Glad I didn't consider the Ferrari this weekend - widespread snow would have dented the fun a bit! Unfortunately that probably means I won't ever get it now, as I'm not sure my capabilities are up to it any more - we'll have to see how Christmas goes

Anyway, that's enough for now,

Speak soon(ish)

Col

Monday, 14 December 2009

Monday 14th December 2009

Hi again,

I should have posted yesterday really, as it was my birthday (46!), but I had a bit of a low energy day again and spent most of the day in bed, and what was left of it firmly glued to the sofa.

It's been mostly the same since my last post really - my only time out of the house was the weekly visit to the hospice on Thursday.

I did have some good news whilst I was there though - I had a blood test last week to check for a few things, particularly dehydration as I am unable to drink much at the moment. The results show that I am not dehydrated and nor am I showing any signs of anemia which is all good. There are a couple of results called "tumour markers". I'm not sure what they mean, but one is up on last time and one is down. I'm seeing my oncologist again tomorrow, so we should get some answers from her.

I didn't go for the Ferrari this weekend after all, as I wasn't sure I felt up to making the most of it, and instead I planned for this coming weekend. Unfortunately the forecast is for snow and ice in parts over the weekend, so this might not be an ideal weekend either. We'll see

So that's about it for now. I'll have more to say after tomorrow's oncologist appointment and my GP appointment on Wednesday, so I'll post an update then.

Cheers,

C x

Wednesday, 2 December 2009

Wednesday 2nd December 2009

Hi Folks,

How time flies at the moment. No sooner have I made a blog post than I am suddenly overdue for my next - sorry if I worry you with my absence, but thanks also for those reminders!

Quite a tough week with lack of energy - I'm losing the desire to get out and about so much and am preferring to rest at home as much as I can. I did get out last Friday to meet some mates I used to work with, and it was great to see everyone again, but tinged with a bit of sadness that it would usually be our annual drinking reunion, and I was unable to partake and could only last about an hour and a half.

I also decided earlier in the week that I was no longer up for doing the gig on Saturday, so got my stand-in to play instead. I had planned to go over and see the first part of the show, but again I felt too tired to go out twice in a row, so I ended up staying in. Although I clearly wasn't up to the gig, it is a big shame because that probably sees the end of my gigging days, and after nearly 30 years, that is quite a wrench. However, it has definitely got to the point where the early start, late finish, humping of gear, strain of the gig itself and the associated waiting around has surpassed the fun factor that I used to get, so I guess now is the right time to pack it in. Maybe I'll be able to do one farewell gig at some point - we'll see.

On the health front, not much changes - I had my second session of acupuncture and the jury is still out. I think it would be easier to tell if I was having it for pain relief as the effects would be more obvious, but for nausea and breathlessness its much harder to spot any immediate benefit. I'll keep going though, in the interests of experimentation if nothing else.

On a reduced dose of the steroids now, so I'm not getting much benefit from them, and I'm not sure the effects of the Citalopram anti-depressants have kicked in yet (although some of the side effects like involuntary leg movements have). I'm told it takes a few weeks, but that's three weeks now with no discernible difference - again, I'll have to wait and see.

Other news is that I got my blue disabled badge today, so I am officially disabled and allowed to park for up to 3 hours on double yellow lines, as well as get free parking at lots of places like hospitals etc. I'm thinking of getting the Ferrari in a couple of weeks time if I feel up to it, and I plan to have fun parking it in disabled bays and waiting for people to start having a go at me until I show them my badge! Who says us disabled folks can't have fun? :)

Anyway, that's it for now - need to get back to the sofa for a rest.

As usual I will make a feeble and hollow promise to be more active on the blog in future, but if I fail it is because I have either little to say or little energy to say it, so bear with me :)

Cheers,

Col x

Sunday, 22 November 2009

Sunday 22nd November 2009

What can I say? Spurs beat Wigan today NINE - ONE!! It doesn't get better than that (except if it was Arsenal, Man Utd or Chelsea of course :) Well done chaps - RESULT!

I had my first experience of acupuncture on Thursday - I had needles in my left shoulder, the front of my neck and in each wrist and hand. The arm ones were for the nausea and the shoulder/neck ones for breathlessness. The needles are extremely fine - like a human hair really - so didn't hurt at all and didn't cause any bleeding, just a slight sensation when they went in.

I'm not sure I noticed any immediate change, but I will be having about six sessions, and the effects get more lasting the more sessions you have, so we'll see how things progress.

The steroids are still doing a good job. I'm still short of energy, but I'm able to get up the stairs without necessarily needing a rest at the top. However, I'm in the middle of the course now, so soon I will have to go back to normal, and at that point we can really see if the acupuncture is helping.

I've got a gig next weekend which I'm a little worried about. This might have to be my last, we'll see how it goes, but my strength is definitely waning, and there will become a point when I just don't enjoy it any more due to the effort involved. The gig is in a pub in Didsbury, so hopefully it might at least be ground floor which would help. It's not somewhere we've played before though so I'll have to wait and see.

Not much else to report this week. Just had a nice weekend with my brother and his girlfriend up here for a visit, and now looking forward to Top Gear and Match of the day (nine - one! Can you believe it!!?).

Speak soon whenever I've got something to say!

In the meantime, thanks as usual for all the emails texts and blog comments - I really do appreciate it!

Cheers,

Col x

Monday, 16 November 2009

Monday 16th November 2009

Hi All,

Quite a busy end to the week, so I waited til today to post an update - sorry for the delay!

I had a bit of a bad day on Thursday - I felt really tired and a bit nauseous. I went to the Hospice therapy session and met the doctor and social worker (she's going to help me get a blue disabled badge which will help).


The doctor recommended some drugs for my breathlessness and to help me through the weekend, and she is also going to start me on a course of acupuncture this Thursday to see if she can alleviate some of the underlying nausea I still get.

I got an appointment with my GP Thursday evening and she prescribed me the drugs the Hospice doc had recommended - OraMorph (oral morphine), which helps breathlessness when taken in small doses, and a course of the Dexomethasone steroids I was on during my chemo. These have both helped quite a lot and I've had a pretty good weekend on the energy front, despite suffering a bit from the nausea.


Friday I took delivery of the awesome Audi R8 for the weekend:


Saturday we set off for the MPH Show at the NEC featuring Top Gear Live courtesy of the Stig (thank-you kindly sir, much appreciated!). We had to wait for him in the foyer so he could come out and give us the tickets. When he came out in his civvies it was really funny to watch hundreds of people pass within inches of him with "I am the Stig" t-shirts on, completely unaware that the real thing was standing right by them!

The show was excellent - culminating in the Stig performing a loop the loop in a car - check out the videos ...

Clarkson, Hammond and May racing Reliant Robins - hilarious! ...



Stig doing the loop ...



Sunday we took the R8 out for a run to the East Coast - Scarborough, Robin Hood's Bay and Whitby. I'd been to Whitby before when I was about 9, but neither of the other places so it was a nice trip. I won't mention the speed that the R8 made on the York bypass :) Awesome car, just awesome ... I have to admit that I was pretty knackered when I got in last night though. Driving is still one thing I can do in relative comfort, but it is quite tiring in the end, especially when driving in the dark where my night vision is not quite as sharp as it used to be so I have to really concentrate.

Unfortunately the car was collected this afternoon, so its back to normality for a while - next hire will be a Ferrari F430, so looking forward to that already!

I did mean to post on the 7th Nov, as that was the anniversary of my diagnosis. I am now officially a Government statistic as a "one year cancer survivor". It's been quite a year, but as I've said before, I just seem to have gone along with it and got used to it.

It doesn't really feel any different although my eating and drinking, my energy levels and the fact that I look like one of those guys photographed in a concentration camp at the end of the war with all my ribs sticking out are really different circumstances to get used to.

I'll let you know how I get on with the acupuncture - that's my highlight of this week (and the fact that I officially go off work on Wednesday)

Cheers,

Colin.

Sunday, 8 November 2009

Sunday 8th November 2009

Hi Folks,

Sorry for my distinct lack of posts this week - just laziness I'm afraid, no excuse!

This week I've been ok - I've been to see my GP for a general catch up, and she's prescribed me an anti-anxiety/anti-depressive drug called Citalopram, just in case my mental dip the other week is a sign of something a bit deeper. I've had a re-occurrence of a bit of eczema on my feet which I had a few years ago. This tends to be stress-related. Although I've not really felt stressed at a
ll, the doc thinks this might be my body telling me something, which is another reason she gave me the Citalopram.

One of the side-effects of this drug can be nausea, so I'm on a low dose to start with to see if I tolerate it ok - just one tablet every other day for the moment. I've only had two so far, so nothing to report yet (it takes a couple of weeks to kick in apparently).

I also took up the offer from the Macmillan team to join the weekly therapy session at the local hospice on Thursday. I was a bit daunted at first because it was full of people a lot older than me and had the feel of a nursing home. However, once I'd met some of the staff and other "guests" (as they call us) it was really nice - very positive and friendly atmosphere. They also provide alternative therapy treatments such as massage, reflexology etc. I had a "Theraputic Touch" session, which is a bit like Reiki, but with hands on.

The staff there offer all sorts of useful services - there is a specialist doctor who performs acupuncture and can provide advice specifically tailored to terminally ill patients, plus a social worker who can help with such things as getting a disabled badge for my car so I don't have to walk so far.

Other news - my hair is starting to grow back. Very thin and fluffy at the moment and only growing slowly, but definitely visible now, plus I now have to start shaving again - only every other day, but its definitely growing more vigorously. Nothing has yet grown enough to indicate what my hair will be like when fully grown, so we'll have to wait and see about that, but at least there is progress!

Last couple of weekends have been really nice, mee
ting up with friends I haven't seen for over a year in both cases, and had a rehearsal with the band today, although that was a real struggle as I've been totally without energy all day.

On my way over to Macclesfield last weekend, I had a chance to drop in on Alderley Edge where my family used to live. After my mum died in 1995, I planted a small oak sapling on the edge as a gesture, and I went to see how it was getting on. It's amazing how slowly oaks grow and I am always surprised at how small it still is after 14 years. It must have been about 18" when I planted it, and this is what it looks like now, bigger, but by no means big! ...


That's about it for today, except I can finally mention Spurs again after having to keep silent for a while due to an embarrassing run of defeats (Stoke at home for gawds sake! And Arsenal! It can't have been much worse!) Nice win over Sunderland yesterday to keep us in 4th spot for now. Just hope Man City lose their game in hand now, and we'll be fine!

Better get some rest now - good luck to Elspeth by the way!

Cheers,

Colin.